That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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