K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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