One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
