then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
