Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
