That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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