erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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