You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Randomize
