You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
