"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
