Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
