I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
