Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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