He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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