Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
