Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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