I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Randomize
