And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
