There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Randomize
