is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
