Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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