A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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