Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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