Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
