I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Liz is crying about burritos again.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
