I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
