I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
