I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize