wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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