well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
birth control should be required to get into college
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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