Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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