There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
