i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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