We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Randomize
