Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
