he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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