i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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