what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize