you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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