$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
