you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Please, let me fuck your mom
I understand Curling. That high.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
