I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
