I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize