she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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