mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
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