apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
