i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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