cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
as a side note pls kill me
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