We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
