He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
