I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize